.tied up.

Sunday, December 05, 2004

F.A.C.T

came back from camp today.
camp was different.
really different.
as compared to previous camps...
the nice happy feeling of knowing everyone and being like one huge family was gone.
and i mean gone.
it was weird.
it's the first time we're including the 5612, the ccm, the fourth service & the bb boys.
it's weird.
cause when u step into st francis.
you don't know half the people there.
and it doesn't help,
when you aren't given the time to mingle with them.
and it's really a lot of people you haven't seen before in your life.
oh yah.
and it didn't help that i was half dead for practically the whole camp.
the first night was just monstrous.
shared a sleeping bag with stir.
ended up shivering the whole night til abt 2 am.
left the dorm with jo and stir.
went to the toilet.
stoned at the stairwell.
tried sleeping there.
tried to defrost.
met nic and ben.
continued to try sleeping.
lied fown on the floor.
leaned on the walls.
slept on the steps.
etc.
then jian ming and ron came with lemon biscuits. (:
that was like yummy supper.
since we were all cold and hungry.
got new sleeping bags at 0450.
went to sleep.
woke up at 7 to prepare for worship.
it was really hard to focus.
really hard to prepare.
cause i felt so distant.
a lot of stuff in my life just isn't right with God.
had a really good talk with stir on the first night.
it's been ages since we had time to talk like tt.
wonderful.
(:
i miss stir lots.
anyhow.
back to the worship session.
felt really worried.
but i'm thankful.
that God brought me through.
there were hiccups along the way.
people constantly complaining.
people constantly late.
and stuff.
but yah.
it's good.
and i really wanna thank God that even through all these, He saw me through, and most imptly that He came. and He used us as His vessels to minister. and it was wonderful.
thank God.
(:
anyhow.
i must really say i'm sorry to lenny.
really sorry.
didn't really know if i should talk to you a whole lot during camp.
so i just kinda left u there to figure everything out for urself.
and that was quite bad.
i'm really sorry.
but i didn't really wanna give the younger ones any sort of impression.
cause it's not good.
it could end up as a stumbling block instead.
so i tried to maintain that distance.
anyhow. i hope u enjoyed the camp.
although i really didn't enjoy it much until the 2nd night.
and by then u were gone.
anyhow.
a whole lot of people came on the 2nd night.
timmy, joshua, my brother, mark, luke, alan... etc.
had a good chat with timmy some night.
i don't really remember which night.
yeah but we had a chat.
after such a long time.
you still owe me fish and co k.
heh.
anyway.
on the 3rd day.
there was this hike up bukit timah hill.
i must say.
"FINALLY!"
i mean. finally i get to mingle with my group people.
cause why?
i'm stuck with them.
lost in some part of the hill.
therefore, they couldn't run away.
they didn't have other friends to run away to anyway.
they had to talk to me.
why? cause there's no one else there anyway.
haha.
so it was like... FINALLY i got to know my group members.
i felt tt that was the only "good game".
if it was even considered a game.
i felt the stations were pretty lousy.
and all the previous day games we bad.
but oh well.
i shall keep my comments to myself.
hee.
hmmm. come to think of it.
i've been in camp comms since sec 2.
and i was always in games/admin.
i wanna do food one day.
heh. ok.
anyway.
sat night.
really wanted to talk to mark.
it been rather weird since those days...
and i do miss talking to him too.
anyhow.
took pictures with them.
mark was complaining that he didn't want to take pictures cause he's eyes were small.
but oh well.
we took in the end.
with alan's camera.
so i don't have it.
we did silly things like spying on certain people.
and acting like the paparazzi.
hee. we joked.
talked.
and i really needed to sleep.
cause i was singing for service the next day.
went up.
washed up.
realise there were lotsa people in my dorm talking.
didn't wanna disturb them.
so i went back down.
stoned around.
ben tan as usual, kinda lost in his own world.
we watched janet (jeanette?), alan's sister trash joshua the bum.
talked to nic about stuff.
realised i never really talked to nic before.
but it was quite good.
i like to converse with people.
so anyhow.
nic went up slightly before us.
i went up with mark.
he wanted to sleep.
i needed to sleep.
called alan in my dorm.
met alan outside to pass him the thick yummy sleeping bag.
and he passed me my old thin sleeping bag.
met ben tan.
chatted for a while.
met mark.
wanted to talk.
planned to talk.
didn't talk in the end.
he asked me to go sleep.
and i told him to go down with the rest.
so yep.
i went to sleep.
woke up the next day.
had to wake the rest up.
like louis.
called pris and all...
andrew and i were saying that our voices haven't woken up yet.
i wrote a note to my group.
but i doubt anyone had a chance to read it.
ah! and i wanted to take the note from alphonsus home!
but i forgot! ):
eeks.
anyhow.
they had some bus problem.
so my group and alicia's and nic's group had to wait for like an hour plus.
nic and i started talking in the aircon room.
we were laughing at all the weird stuff.
then mingli came and joined us.
we laughed even more.
so fun! (:
mingli's phone is really uber duber spoilt.
poor girl.
anyway.
i went off the find the ritz biscuit for nic and mingli.
and when i went into the hall.
jo p told me to play captains ball with them.
priscilla just left the court like tt.
and said she'll pass mingli food and i take her place.
wow.
it happened so fast lah.
like i mean. one minute i was still half asleep.
the next, i was in a captains ball game?!
but it was fun.
then after playing.
nic and mingli came in and kinda scolded me.
it was so funny.
cause we were joking about people who are ther one minute and just leave and never return the next minute and u don't know where they went kinda thing.
so yes.
we were laughing about me too.
so yah.
it was quite funny.
then all of us played captains ball.
mingli on zu's team and nic on jo p's.
my slippers broke.
i had to play barefooted.
now i can't really walk.
cause my feet hurt.
except for my heels.
so i walk on my heels. (:
anyhow.
the bus finally came.
ben tan's eyes were really SMALL lah.
as in cannot see it.
really cannot see already.
nic and jo p were acting as tour guides.
i was stoning and trying to sleep.
we compared who's leg is longer and who's leg can touch the floor...
etc.
yes we were bored.
reached back.
shared a cab with cass.
walked out.
met mark.
said byebye.
went home.
walked home from cass' place.
maybe i've grown older.
but things are really different now.
and i don't know if i've moved on.
but i still miss the old times.
where pam, stir, josh, mark...
jo, sherrie, timmy...
all of us would spend lotsa time together.
when we knew everyone.
and everyone was just so close.
miss it.
i miss that feeling.
but oh well.
i guess we all drifted a lot.
):
miss u all.

during the camp.
i made this promise to God.
I PLEDGED MY ENTIRE LIFE TO GOD.
FOR THE PURPOSE OF GOD.
TO LIVE IN GOD.
TO SERVE HIM.

jia. i've got something real impt to tell you.
really. something super exciting and impt.
i shall find some way to get to you.
heh heh heh.

[ Jude whispered ][ 11:59 PM ]

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